design / host
The harmony of my garden
2001-07-17 @ 2:15 p.m.
The threat of rain is looming outside: clouds, decreasing temperature, and an unbearable humidity. Due to the sudden cloudiness, my attention has wandered it's way over the window where I'm faced with my backyard: an endless sea of weeds, rickity old wood fences, and flowers that shouldn't be there anymore.Yes, the signs of an old garden exist in an otherwise forgotten realm. My backyard doesn't live, it just survives. What would one expect after nearly 10 years of maternal neglect?
I say "maternal neglect" because my mom was quite the gardener. She'd spend all her summer time outside, digging through dirt so that our backyard would be dotted with flowers and plants, fruits and vegetables. Occasionally, my brother and I would go with her on many a trip to Franks and other such stores to pick out some type of flower we found attractive. (it was usually purple) And then of course there was the fruits and vegetables-- being 5 years old with a bowl of strawberries in your hand while your mother sat over the garden picking the freshest ones was enough to make anyone feel like they lived in the country side and not a well known city. I bet she secretly wanted to live in the country, and not in a noisy place with too many people in your space.
With the general emotional scarring and effects of divorce, also comes a more concrete and noticable scarring. My mother left when I was somewhere in the educational level of 3rd grade and my brother's, though older, were equally young. Aside from leaving her children, she also left her garden. It was then that this beautiful greenery, would suffer an endless neglect and be overtaken by weeds and harsh weather. Yet, despite the lack of care and amount of ignoring my backyard has suffered, flowers that were planted 10 years ago, still seem to poke their heads up from the dirt every spring and summer. The daisies have died, and so have the various other small flowers. Strawberries and tomatoes no longer call my backyard their home, but obnoxious green weeds have taken kindly to the used space of vegetable and fruits.
However, tall orange flowers still grow against the side of the white garage. And roses still pop up next to our house. And our lilac bush still adds it's purple color. But they don't seem to be living. They seem to be surviving and are awaiting patiently they day they no longer have to make an appearance in a weedy, rotten home.
I can sympathize with that garden. My left me too. I see her... but there's definate scarring the "maternal neglect" I've experienced.